Question #2 – Do You Know How You Are Supposed to Improve?

To grow, most people need knowledge, experience, and coaching. You may not be able to do all 3 right now. But you can start with one or two. I shared with you before the decision I made to have a personal fitness trainer and to participate in a fitness group training. With that trainer, I am getting all 3. I did not know there were so many ways to have meaningful workout sessions. I meet with the trainer once a week for only 30 minutes -thanks goodness it’s only 30 minutes. I get so much done in 30 minutes than I could have accomplished on my own in one hour or two hours.

I used to go to the gym by myself. During those times, I only used few machines and worked out only the same “couple of muscles”. With my trainer, I am now using almost every muscle. Another benefit of having a trainer is that I have an accountability partner. Having a coach or trainer (or accountability partner) does not mean you have to hire someone. It does help to have someone who cares enough about you to help you grow. You need someone who has the strength and expertise that you are looking for.

Consistency: You see, this post is coming to you at the eleventh hour. It is because I did not assign a specific time to the task. But I could not go to bed without sending it.

The Law of Consistency – 4 Questions in 4 Days

Happy Memorial Day!

As we are taking the time today to remember the men and women who have given all so we can enjoy this great freedom, I hope that all of us we will continue to do our part in making the necessary sacrifices so tomorrow can be a better day for the people in our circle of influence.

In regard to The Law of Consistency as the fifth of the 15 laws of growth that John Maxwell has developed, I’m going to review with you, in four consistent days, four questions that will help you grow in consistency.

Day 1 – Monday May 27, 2019

Do you know what you need to improve?

Journalist and author George Lorimer remarked, “You’ve got to get up every morning with determination if you’re going to go to bed with satisfaction.” You can’t master anything else if you can’t master yourself.  John stated in the book, “Your future is dependent upon your personal growth. Improving yourself daily guarantees you a future filled with possibilities.”

How and where to start?  Start with the first law; The Law of Intentionality. Decide today that you are going to work on growing yourself. Next, move to The Law of Awareness which states, “You must know yourself to grow yourself.”  Use members of your family and close friends to help you in this area. Recently few people have pointed out some areas that I needed to improve. They were brutally honest with me. These people care about me.

I was in Dominican Republic few days ago. Many people from different regions in the country told me clearly, that “I need to be fluent in Spanish.” It seemed they had a meeting to talk about how they could encourage me to improve my Spanish. I have been going there since 2006. They can’t wait to see me being able to converse freely with them in their native tongue. While the feedback was direct and poignant, it left me with a sense of urgency to achieve that goal. Another business friend told me last week that I must spend more times developing my marketing skills so I can let people know how I can help them in their personal lives and businesses.

These two feedbacks were not the things that were easy for me to hear. But they were exactly what I needed to hear because they spoke to the core of 2 areas I needed to improve. Why are they important to me?  It is because I value people and I want to add value to people. I am now working on the rule of 20 hours. I am devoting 20 hours of consistent and intensive effort every day to each task (six days a week, 30 minutes a day) working on my Spanish and learning new things about marketing. I also developed a process to do that.

E. M. Gray said, “The successful person has the habit of doing the things that failures don’t like to do. The successful person doesn’t like doing them either, but his dislike is subordinated to the strength of his purpose.” John added, “The more tuned you are to your purpose, and the more dedicated you are to growing toward it, the better your chances of reaching your potential, expanding your possibilities, and doing something significant.”

Consistency Requires Sacrifices

Personal Example: This past weekend, I made an attempt to post pictures on Instagram and Pinterest. I realized again that I am not good at doing these tasks. I don’t even like to do them. The dislike makes it more difficult to want to improve in these areas. The above quote speaks to me. I must change if I am to find ways to help these children in that orphanage.

I just got back from the DR. I have beautiful pictures I could share, not to brag about myself, but to show the impact the excursionists that went with me had on the people they served. I must develop a plan and dedicate time (part of the 20 hours on marketing) to take a course on Instagram and Pinterest for dummies.

Do you know what you need to improve? Decide today that you’re going to be intentional about finding out what you need to improve. Listen to feedback that your friends, customers, vendors and others are giving you. Identify one or two areas you need to improve. Make a plan. Start small. Apply consistent and intensified effort for a very specific time. Do that until you see the growth you are looking for. Be patient while being consistent. Remember that, “Growth doesn’t happen automatically.” “Motivation gets you going—Discipline keeps you growing.”

The Law of Reflection and the Law of Consistency

The Law of Reflection: Learning to pause allows growth to catch up with you.

The Law of Consistency: Motivation gets you going—Discipline keeps you growing.

“The hallmark of excellence, the test of greatness, is consistency.” Jim Tressel     

Of the first 5 laws of growth we have reviewed together, the Law of Consistency is the most difficult for me. What about you?

Dr John C. Maxwell shares this wisdom and reveals a secret about how we can be more consistent. He says, “It’s difficult to remain engaged in anything if you have not found a way to value and appreciate the process. Make a list of everything you like about personal growth. If your list is very short, really work at it. Anything you can find as motivation will help you to develop better growth habits.”  The wisdom is having a process. The secret is found in the first law which is the Law of Intentionality.

Share with us some examples where you find yourself doing something consistently. Share also one thing that you know you need to do consistently, but you struggle to remain consistent. What would be the payoff if you were able to do that task on a consistent basis?

From Accidental to Intentional Growth

Change from Accidental to Intentional Growth

How do you know if you’ve slipped into a rut? Take a look at the differences between accidental growth and intentional growth:

ACCIDENTAL GROWTH INTENTIONAL GROWTH
Plans to Start Tomorrow Insists on Starting Today
Waits for Growth to Come Takes Completely Responsibility to Grow
Learns Only from Mistakes Often Learns Before Mistakes
Depends on Good Luck Relies on Hard Work
Quits Early and Often Perseveres Long and Hard
Falls into Bad Habits Fights for Good Habits
Talks Big Follows Through
Plays it Safe Takes Risks
Thinks Like a Victim Thinks Like a Learner
Relies on Talent (only) Relies on Character
Stops Learning after Graduation (or certificate) Never Stop Learning

How do you score your growth pattern? Find one or two area where you need to make the transition from accidental growth to intentional growth and make the decision today to overcome that weakness. Work on it until it becomes a strength. If you start today, you know that you are on your way to overcome the procrastination weakness.

Avoid Distraction While You Are on Your Growth Journey

Distraction: It is from Latin distractionem—taking the mind away from one point or course to another. Another definition is “A thing that keeps someone from concentrating on another thing.” Distractions happen so frequently that we sometime don’t pay attention to them. Athletes and other professionals have learned the importance of staying focused on the task at hands. The mind does not multi tasks very well. A lot of productive hours are wasted because of distractions at work.

Here are some examples of distractions that you need to be aware of:

This one happens to me too often. I open my emails to either read new emails or send emails. I look at the unread emails and start deleting them. Emptying my mail box is not bad thing to do. But when I do it when I am supposed to do a task that was scheduled (or a task that had a higher priority), I allow that activity to distract me.

Social media: How can social media be a distraction?

TV: How can watching TV be a distraction?

Chat: How can that be a distraction?

The list of distractions can go on and on. I challenge you this week to pay attention to the distractions in your lives. When you assign a time to a task, stick to the assignment. It is easy to do fun things in the place of the things you have to do.

Time is a currency of exchange and growth. It is given to all of us equally. We can either spend it or invest it. Time spent does not pay dividends. Time invested pays dividends and compounds. Getting distracted in doing fun things or things we did not assign time to is a great way to spend time. Being disciplined and remaining focused on the task before us is a great way to invest our time.

As you catch yourself in the distraction mode, be strong and realign yourself. Growth is not automatic. Neither is success.

Growing Pain and Growing Joy

Happy Mother’s Day to all mothers who are reading this post this day. As I was contemplating the topic for this post, it came to my mind the reminder that all mothers have experienced some growing pains and some growing joys. At least at one moment in their lives—during labor—they experience the pain and the joy within a short amount of time – even within few hours; the pain that comes with the preparation of the body for delivery and the joy of being delivered and welcoming that precious child.

When you are growing you may experience some pains before you experience some joys. When I first attended my core fitness class, I experienced a lot of pains. It’s has been many decades since I worked on my core. I did not even know that I could do these exercises to strengthen my core. Every move was painful and hard. They still continue to be hard for me. The instructor seemed to be having a lot of fun.

With passing of time and after taking several moments to reflect and evaluate my life I have learned 3 attributes that one must constantly be focusing one when taking a growth journey. These attributes are resiliency, humility, and gratitude.

Resiliency: You must be resilient during the growing process because at time you will experience setbacks and failures. You have to be ready to bounce back. A lady who had participated in multiple Paralympics and who had won silver in one of them said “that the difference between the lady who won gold and her and the rest was not the fact that lady did not fall during her runs. The difference was that in how fast she got up after a fall.”  Being resilient will help you stay the course despite the difficulties you may face.

Humility: Be humble during moments of bountiful so you can be resilient during times of trials. Humility will keep you grounded. It will also give you the strength you need to move toward the next phase of the journey. Too many people start celebrating their victory before they cross the finish line. Remember in growing, there is no finish line. There are only milestones. You can rejoice and celebrate each milestone. But do it with a grateful heart. And after that, get moving.

Gratitude: A grateful heart is a heart that is always growing. Our heart enjoys every single breath it takes. For that breath gives it life. Be grateful that you can grow. Be grateful during the growing pain and the growing joy.

Cultivating these attributes daily will help keep your heart and mind focus on the journey and the goal. I am so grateful and humble that I can walk with you on this growth journey. Having you by my side helps me to be more resilient.